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7 Feb
Chivalrous Men and the Victim-Princess Complex

I recently came across an article sporting the irresistible title, A Nation of Little Princesses. Author Christopher Healy explores the archetype of the princess, which he asserts “is one of the longest-lived in all of literary history.”

My first reaction was to think, “Here’s some Neanderthal guy trying to peddle outdated gender stereotypes.” But Healy points to the fact that the Disney Corporation has assembled a Princess brand consisting of eight animated film heroines including Cinderella, Snow White, Pocahontas, Belle of Beauty of the Beast, and others. In 2003 the Princess line racked up an astonishing $2.5 billion in sales, up from a mere $300 million in 2001.

And that’s just for starters. “We’ve gone beyond the dress-up and toys, and begun to look at the brand as a lifestyle, filling out all the other things girls need in life,” according to Mary Beech, Disney director of franchise management. Things girls need in life?

Healy, proud dad of a three-year-old girl, notes with an equal mix of astonishment and horror, “The ease and rapidity with which a princess obsession can take hold of a young girl’s psyche is mind-blowing.”

Eventually those little Jennifers and Bethanies grow up, go to college, and enroll in their first Women’s Studies course. There they learn that the kiss by their Prince Charming really represents non-consensual sexual assault, that Belle’s Beast is a closet bodice-ripper, and that the fable of the Princess talking to the Green Frog at the side of the well is an allegory of serial rape.

But the Women’s Studies gurus explain they can still make their dreams of tiaras and sequin-studded dresses come true: “Join the Sisterhood, and we’ll turn you into a real princess!”

According to the feminist fable, women were kept under heel for so many millennia that members of the fairer sex need to play “catch-up.” So now women should be the beneficiaries of an ever-expanding array of legal protections, government programs, commercial products, and lifestyle options. That’s the Victim-Princess Complex.

Before long these Wicked Witches of the North have cast a spell on their Little Pretties. These young women soon graduate from college believing that women are paid less for the same work, that women were routinely excluded from medical research, and a multitude of other tragedies that have befallen womankind. Victimization has become a mainstay of their self-identity.

It’s not just the feminist propaganda mill that endlessly replays the woman-as-victim mantra. Chivalrous men, acting out their fantasies of the White Knight in Shining Armor, are guilty as well.

Pick up a copy of your local newspaper and you will see articles – usually written by male reporters and columnists – that reinforce the notion of the downtrodden female. Accounts of women who are stressed-out, undervalued, and abused form the staple of daily news reporting.

Recently I attended a conference where a speaker blandly made the claim that 60 million women around the world had “disappeared.” He didn’t bother to offer any details or proof. And he certainly didn’t say anything about men who were never heard from again.

I imagine that catering to women’s insecurities makes these men feel gallant and proud. But chivalry is defined as being “considerate and courteous to women.” Slanting and distorting the truth – that’s chicanery, not chivalry.

Yet there’s a downside to the Princess-Victim Complex.

Myrna Blyth, former editor of Ladies Home Journal, reveals how women’s magazines turn female victimization into a hard sell for the latest beauty products or weight control program. Blyth decries how these magazines promote “narcissism as an advanced evolutionary stage of female liberation. Me, me, me, means you’re finally free, free, free.”

But the problem goes beyond self-absorbed narcissism.

In his Nation of Little Princesses article, Christopher Healy quotes a father who observes, “Well, that’s the magic of Disney: It’s addictive. It’s like crack for 5-year-olds.”

So the Victim-Princess Complex begins to resemble a dysfunctional habit in which the negative feelings of being a victim require ever-larger “fixes” for women to feel good about themselves. And those fixes come with a hefty price tag. Princesses “only find true happiness once they’re married off with royal expense accounts,” Healy laments.

These women are undoubtedly the most prosperous, pampered, and protected group in the history of the world. But they would still have you believe that women aren’t getting a fair shake.

What is the truth of feminism? A fairy tale come true, or a royal deception that appeals to the most primitive instincts of men and women alike?

This is what the US male is up against-it has been festering for a long time. We are just as much fault for this as are women. Respecting women is not being a wimp-but letting them dictate your every awake moment is. I thought I would never use this word self-esteem we referring to men–I always connected that word with women. But younger men today–have been told so many things-by the media-school-parents that they don’t know how to act.

“Must get in touch with your feminine side” who in the hell came up with that –40 years ago that quote did not exist–your feminine side what the hell does that mean anyway? Not too long ago I opened a door at a grocery store for a young woman, she looked at me and said ” I am perfectly capable opening my own doors” well in my mind I said that is it–no more being helpful for the younger females–they want to have it all ——–well they got it!!

The Feminist movement has destroyed all respect between males and females-now it is “I can do anything you can do”–and males now believe it!!! I am sorry but there is a difference between males and females–(physically)–mentally you can change that belief in the male mind and the feminist have succeeded in doing just that…

Feminist movement has destroyed the US male–(there are some that have not been influenced by the propaganda taught) and that is because of men who taught their boys to be men–passing down what manhood is from their fathers and grandfathers…

My father held two sometimes three jobs to support his family–never complained or whined

He respected woman-open doors for them-stood up when a woman entered the room. Did not use curse words around woman (females) and as far as that goes around his children. Today the F word is used everywhere-around woman-children who cares

He could repair his own car -did his own repairs on our home-cut the grass-all those tasks that were required to keep our home in good condition.

He taught his three sons to hunt-to fish-to respect woman and to help them when they needed it-to respect our grandparents-older people-our teachers and taught us about our country (he fought in WWII as well as all my uncles) respect the flag, why we have our freedoms-who protected them.

My father always had time for us–when I went to war (Vietnam) how I was raised, by my mother and father how they encouraged me to play football,baseball, how my father taught me how to take pain (through example) how to stand on my own two feet, these all got me through that war and home in one piece.

My mother and father were married 49 years before he died, they stayed together through thick and thin–raised four children on a workers pay.

Today a lot of what I have listed above is missing in our society,divorce and the split up of the American family has contributed to much of the ills our nation suffers from today. American men must revisit those attributes that made American men the envy of the whole world….

Corny you say—well what I am saying is coming from a 62 year old. I have seen the flowering of the feminist movement and its negative impact on the American Male and Female, and as an American Male I do not like it.